I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
