Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
