8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
