Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I came so hard my ears popped.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
