I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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