you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
