sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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