This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
