I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
