We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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