I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
