He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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