This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
