I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
