Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
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