Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
