My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
