Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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