Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
