So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
honey bunches of taint.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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