did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
