are you so shy because you have an std?
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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