i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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