And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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