she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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