You can't motorboat a personality
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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