So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
