Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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