I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
