The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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