so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Randomize
