Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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