I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
As shirtless as possible
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
