Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize