the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize