Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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