I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Randomize