just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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