The maid of honor just puked.
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
