alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Operation Purity has been aborted
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
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