dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
