No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
