quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
