Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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