so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize