The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
