Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
