just come out here and I will go home with you...
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
