WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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