i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
