I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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